THE DAY THE MUSIC DIED

            I am now finding it hard to listen to music, oh I hope this feeling passes soon, the only respite I have pretty much ever had was listening to music, I love most music, although I do not have a special place in my repertoire for jazz smooth or otherwise, to me it has always had a whining sound, just rubs me the wrong way. Some country music, even though I love bluegrass is not at the top of my list either, forget rap music, no use for that at all. My dad was a music lover too and he had a very nice voice for singing also, dad loved the blues and zydeco music he amassed quite a collection of cd's and tapes with this particular music on it. I can remember growing up with the sound of Irish music in the house, mostly on the weekends, dad loved that too, he use to tell us he grew up with Irish dancing in his household as a kid, company coming on Sunday's and how the furniture would be moved out of the living room so they could all have room to dance, I am pretty sure some alcohol was also involved in these gatherings of friends and family.  Mom on the other hand loved her Mario Lanza, her opera as she called it, I know her fav song has always been Ave Maria, I can also recall her mother's fav song was Greensleeves. Music an escape for us all.                                                                Being introduced to Rock n Roll was such an experience for me too, I can recall a dance I went to in my first year of high school it  was the first time I had ever seen a strobe light in sync with the music, that did not go too well for me, kind of "freaked me out" and believe me no drugs were involved in this situation, I actually thought I was having an epileptic seizure, when I think back on it now it was probably my first real "panic attack", needless to say I stayed away from those things. I am going to be honest with you here I have never ever taken any kind of drug, not even a "joint" so I can honestly say I am a drug virgin, drugs have always given me a type of fear feeling that I experienced thru friends and relatives, I can recall as a teen how a family member had "disappeared" for a few days, we thought she had been a runaway as it turned out she had an "LSD experience" and had no idea where she was or what had happened to her, thank god she survived and was none the worst for it but it sure did put the fear of god in me so music and drugs were never a mix for me I guess I enjoyed music so much I just did not need anything to enhance my experience of it.                               As we go thru our different stages of life that is also how music has  effected me  (effect or affect) never know which one to use. I also know that watching movies or tv is where I have found a lot of music to my liking. I remember when I first saw the movie "The Blues Brothers" the scene in the church with all the gospel music, a new appreciation of that genre was born. I wanted to go visit all the churches in Chicago's south side neighborhoods on a Sunday just to listen to gospel hymns, such an uplifting feeling I got from that particular music, another movie  that got to me was the musical "Camelot" what a soundtrack that movie produced, oh, how it affected my teenage mind then. Hubby and I also fell in love with  "Fiddler on the Roof" soundtrack, oh the sounds we lived our lives to !                                                                                                                                                                   I cannot go further without mentioning the bands in my lifetime also, of course the first was the "Beatles" and thousands of others followed, but as anyone who knows me will tell you my most favorite of all has been and always will be  "U2", oh that Bono, my boyo, now mind you Bono was my son in another lifetime, being 42% Irish I can claim this, the first time I saw Bono singing on MTV I cried, I had the strongest feeling that I had finally found him, my boy that was taken from me back in the homeland (Ireland) during the times of the troubles, ripped from his mother's arms by gunfire and during all my future lives having finally found him. Go ahead, you can say it, "What a nutjob," lots of others have, I do not mind. I have never ever had that feeling of "deja vue" with another human being except my "Bono". He has made a "mother" proud.  For my 40th birthday my son and sister gifted me with going to see "U2" in concert, oh what an experience that was. We had lawn seats and the "pot" was wafting in the air all night long, my first and only time I actually got "high", the concert started at 9pm and lasted until midnight. I however was not able to get out of the parking lot until 2am due to the massive traffic jam, I did not mind though, even though i had an hour drive ahead of me it was the best present I have ever received.                                                                         As our lives have always gravitated and revolved around family and friends so does our music, I know there will come a day hopefully soon that I can listen to all my music, my tunes, without tears, heartbreak or sadness overwhelming me, I will be able to listen and have good memories, a smile maybe even a hearty laugh recalling what those few notes meant to me. I will just keep telling myself  "this too shall pass".  I love and miss you desperately my sweet man !!!     That is all for today my "SPECIAL READERS"  Ta-Ta  for now !!